The Old School Lunch

I was going to a work event today with two female co-workers/somewhat friends and they somehow got to talking about height, partners, and our culture. One of them started talking about how she’s really self-conscious of dating anyone who is shorter than her (she is about 5′6) and that her current boyfriend is “barely taller” at about 5′8. I forget what the other co-worker specifically said (she’s about 5′0) but more or less it echoed what the first woman was saying. They went on about they wouldn’t be able to wear heels and such if they dated anyone around their height, just a few inches taller or even someone shorter.

I am probably 5′6 or so. Now I don’t really care who my co-workers/somewhat friends date or what they think, but I would hope that it’s just common decency to not make such statements when the dude who is driving the car is himself short. Do you think they would’ve said something like “yea, I don’t date black guys” if I were Black? I don’t think so. Well, that’s not a perfect example because i’ve heard more times than i’d like to remember Asian women (friends, co-workers, strangers) say almost proudly to me that they won’t date Asian men. I get it. I’m not going to rant here about how Asian men get maligned in society. If you want to read that read AngryAsianMan.

Everyone is to blame for how we think about height. Men are to blame because most men will not date taller women for a variety of completely bullshit reasons (women gotta be weaker, demure, etc). Most women in turn won’t date anyone who is shorter than them (men gotta be strong, tall, etc). I get it. It’s a pretty simple but fucked up equation. But seriously, I would think it’s just tact to leave that shit at home and not bring it up.

I’m not saying that people who have height issues are bad people. I have height issues, we all do. I’m not saying women who think and act like my co-workers are bad people. If I were to take a random sampling of 100 women, i’m sure I would get about 98% to say that they only date taller men. I’m not going to waste time trying to fight that impossible battle. But what I cannot tolerate is people throwing that shit in my face. I take that shit personally when you can’t avoid that as a conversation piece if we’re sitting there. You date taller men, latino men, Asian women, whatever. Fine, good for you, I hope you find someone like that. But seriously do you have to spout off about it? I may have issues with dating someone who is potentially disabled (blind, deaf, whatever). But if I were sitting there talking in a group with a bunch of people and some women there happened to be disabled in whatever form, I would go out of my way to NOT say “I don’t date disabled women.”

It’s not that hard. It’s just common courtesy.

And to the two co-workers. I know one in particular more than the other but both of you can fuck off.

As usual, San Francisco leads the way.

I know in an ideal world, there wouldn’t be prostitution in any form. And I hate to say “it’s always going to be here” but it’s always going to be here. And if it is, i’d rather that we legalize it so that a John thinks twice before he hits/rapes a sex-worker because he knows she’s unlikely to go to the police. It’s pretty simple. You legalize it and if something does happen, there is greater reason to report it because then you know the law isn’t going to shit on the victim more than it already does. And I know, I know even if this does pass the law and male-dominated institutions like the police are probably going to blame the victim anyways, but it’s a start.

I can imagine the stupid arguments against Proposition K:

Criticism: It’ll just increase prostitution in the area. We don’t need more sex work being done here.
Bullshit: Sure, it’ll probably increase prostitution but it’s not like sex-work would’ve grinded to a halt if it didn’t pass. And why do you care? This goes on in motel rooms and people’s houses in private.

Criticism: Well, it’ll lead to more crime. Because with those Johns you get weirdos and a lot of crime.
Bullshit: I don’t think so. If anything, you would have less of Johns beating the shit out of prostitutes. You’d have less sexual assaults and less Johns just plain dodging the bill. Who loses in this situation? I can’t see anyone.

Criticism: It sends a bad message. It tells our kids that prostitution is OK.
Bullshit: See above. If you really want to do right by your kids and talk to them about the rates of violence against women and how our laws work to hurt the victims even more, you’d have an open conversation with them and talk about how this is a possible benefit. You can still say prostitution is wrong, but criminalizing it doesn’t work either. And that’s not even to mention the sheer number of people who solicit sex workers. If you’re so anti-prostitution, why don’t you go after those who are actively looking for prostitutes? Why don’t you go after the Elliot Spitzers? The government heads who get caught with prostitutes at hotels? No. We’re more interested in pictures of Spitzer’s lady friend and putting her life through the mill. I don’t hear anyone picketing government offices saying how bad of role models some of these folks are.

Criticism: Well, we have to treat it like the war on drugs. Go after the suppliers.
Bullshit: This isn’t the war on drugs. I can understand going after the people who supply to those who buy. But there is a huge difference between some drug-lord unloading packages of dope that make their way down to high schools in Maryland and someone who has sex with someone else for money via Craigslist. What people should be worried about is that the sex-worker (lets face it, women) is of legal age and isn’t forced into the work by some pimp or gang.

Well, that’s a first.

Today I arrived at work at 11:00am. I went to get lunch at about 1:00pm and it was when I was walking to my car that I noticed the window was smashed in and my iPod and GPS unit were both stolen. I don’t leave both in plain view but I guess the crook got away with some gear.

I can replace the gear, but what I don’t like having on my mind is that this person now has the addresses for everywhere I have been to and go frequently. It has my address, my parent’s address, my little brother’s address, my work address, everything. I hope that he’s actually smart about it and just resets the damn thing to sell it but half of me hopes he doesn’t so I can catch the fucker on craigslist.

We work in sort of a disheveled area of town and this just makes me wish that much more that we would move to a different building.

Is how one reviewer describes the film, Snow Angels.

I just finished watching it and I can say that this is probably one of the worst movies I have ever seen. And believe me, I’ve rented some shitty movies. I once rented a movie starring Bridget Moynahan about her and her family getting attacked by bloodthirsty lions in the African jungle. I turned that movie off after 20 minutes and those 20 minutes were better than this film.

[Spoiler alert]

Maybe it’s just me, but when one of the major storylines is of some dumbass drunk bible-reciting asshole of a father who stalks his ex-wife and then makes her go through some torturous last moments before her death (before he blows her brains out with a shotgun, that is), I tend to not think so highly of a film. With that storyline, there is no hope, there is no message, there is nothing but some cheap attempt at something someone hopes to call artistic or “real.”

I’ve got all the real I can take just by reading the damn paper. There really doesn’t have to be yet another film about an abusive/stalking ex-boyfriend/husband who kills his ex-wife and then kills himself.

Seriously. To the reviewers that say this is some great film a la American Beauty, I don’t know what they’re shooting up their veins.

Beyond the other storyline which was much more interesting and had actually a real dose of sadness/happiness, this is the worst fucking movie ever.

This is how bad it was. The asshole father/murderer character is probably more annoying than Ziggy from The Wire. And to anyone who has watched The Wire, that was one annoying motherfucker.